He knew some magic he knew some charm
Out of so many varied tricks he knew
My life's magician mastered this one too
He had a particular knack for this kind of cheat
No devil could replace him from the top seat
He showed such unmatchable skill for that feat
By the time i realized
my crush had shifted gears
My prolonged longings
had become ever flowing tears
All i was left with were
a baby and all the worldly fears
My mind refused to work
my heart still facing quiver
My feelings succumbed to death
my soul died of an unknown fever
Tears roll down my life
Emotions flood my world
Feelings long evaporated
leaving behind a life so curled
No one can find my trust now
none i believe anymore
You squeezed my sweetness
leaving behind a life so sore
Smiles faded
Heart shivered
Memories haunted
Happiness crumpled
Relationship cheated
Sentiments crushed
Thoughts troubled
Spirit dissolved
Tears befriend
--sudharm baxi
Though a sad piece, but i am happy that i compiled this. Another of 3WW, the three words to be used were Crush, Knack and Varied.
36 comments:
This had such an interesting flow, much feeling. Thanks for sharing.
my pleasure ThomG,
And thank you for dropping by..
Nicely done, going through so many styles, but Thom's right - it flows nicely.
Feelings long evaporated
leaving behind a life so curled - very vivid image here. Sad poem.
It has many nuances..
mainline to the heart
@anthony,
@neverending..,
@gautami,
Thanks a lot for dropping by and giving it a read..
Such sadness, so eloquently expressed!
Hmmm, I've known a few of those 'magicians' in my time. Nicely written.
You have not once moved an inch away from sadness. The sad feel remains throughout the piece. Good job!!! Keep writing!!!
so moving!
Surely a moving piece - sad but often true... Nicely done!
I like the continuity through the diferent styles, I'm sorry to hear the narrator was left holding the bsby.
Very sad but lovely piece.
Sad, intense :) Interesting flow.
Thank you all for dropping by..
And i am happy that you could sense the bits of emotions expressed, in one flow, in one entirety...
Am I noticing a pattern here? Wasn't your last piece about heartache? Should we be worried?
Nay susan,
Thanks for the concern..
These poems though come out of my heart but my mind rules in all of them, so no heartache; simply plain, neat poetry with a lot of sufferings but none personal :)
Thanks again!!
good one bro!!!
sahi mein its very sad and intense... n look somebody's writings are getting out of their teens now...
n now u have got some fan following too... but dont stop here.. its just a start... abhi to to u have to go distances...
my wishes and support are with you....
great going...
@niket,
Thank you very much for all that, and i can't stop if friends and well-wishers like you are by my side..
U have played with words very effectively...A deep journey from fading smiles to befriending tears speaks truely of the dark and lonely feelings.....Good
hey Namrata,
Good to see you here...
And thanks for the words of praise!!
Moving piece.
a sad tale.. I like the rhyming
@Ofira,
@Lissa,
Thanks !!
Good 1 Sudharm.But sad 2 I shud say.
Which makes it even better
HARSHA
Hey Harsha,
Thanks for dropping by
Sadness actually widens the scope for the poet; just like a black background enhances the effects of brighter colors..
and i know you are a sadness lover too!! :)
From a musician's point of view, sadness is the power of the blues! There is an interesting narrowing architecture to this poem. I love the line "tears roll down my life"! Nicely done.
Spontaneous flow! Keep it up :)
@Michael,
Completely agree with you..
The same goes for poets, narrators, actors and almost every artist.. Sadness portrayal has a wide spectrum to explore..
@Winnie the poohi,
Thanks for noticing..
superb!!!!! nicely written..... diving into deeeeeeeee.......p emotion.
Aisi Saza deti hawa, tanhaai bhi tanha nahi.
Neendien bhi ab sone gayi, raaton ko bhi parwaah nahi.....
good .... here you played with words by not breaking the flow....enters direct in to the heart....well written....
Thanks for writing ....
@Naren,
Well said!!
@Lokesh,
Thanks for the complement..
tat's what i would call a wonderful flow laced with sadness... beautiful piece sudharm... loved it :)
@Viji,
Thanks for noticing!!
And last para z jst mind blowing.
Want to read more of you.
Was searching for your clown's poem dat you wrote.
@Harsha,
Thank you, you are the first who pin-pointed the beauty of the last stanza.
And you can find the clown poem at -
Weeping Clown
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