Monday, March 30, 2009

What is Victory?

Victory is what i crave for
Victory is what i can kill for
Indeed for victory i can die for

Describing victory is not a child's play
it's not like building castles with wet clay

It is the net outcome of
a wholesome effort
and never-say-die spirit
at every step of the
extraordinarily initiated feat

It is the profound pride that follow
It is the joy that fills the hollow

But there are stories behind
the medal glory and pride curtain
about the life so left out and uncertain


torn wings*
broken limbs
crying mothers
weeping kids
open wounds
closed lids**

dependent life
mourning wife

Past gracious glory is now
nothing but an unending story

Not told to boast off or brag about
but just to re-live that daring life
and savor all those tiny bits of the
praise bestowed for the winning strife

.
.
.
* spirit/ambition
** lesser options in life

Thanks to the 'Winged Victory' photo at EPTAS for inspiration..

--sudharm baxi

14 comments:

James Parker said...

Inspiring and intriguing. You are a master at probing the depths of meaning.

Fledgling Poet said...

This was rich with emotion and meaning...powerful!

sudharm baxi said...

@James,
@Fledgling poet,

Thanks a bunch for dropping by..

anthonynorth said...

Powerful words - yes, there is always a price.
Well said.

sudharm baxi said...

@anthony,

Thanks and so true, a victory certainly leaves a lot of prices to be paid and that too not only by the victor..

Tumblewords: said...

Powerful piece packed with meaning!

Julia Smith said...

'But there are stories behind
the medal glory and pride curtain'

Really love that.

SweetTalkingGuy.. said...

I think perhaps the wisdom that comes with experience shines through this piece.

sudharm baxi said...

@Tumblewords,
@Julia,
@SweetTalkingGuy,

Thanks a lot for all the kind words..

Pretty Me!! said...

the lines in red and the words that followed.. just too good !!

sudharm baxi said...

@Pretty Me,

Tried my best to be as concise as possible and hence those words in red..

thanks for noticing..

Brosreview said...

Quite prose-like, isn't it? Not that it's bad. I am just writing my observations.

Some changes, if I may:

remove the word "the" wet clay. That does not sound right to me.

And, use capital "I" instead of "i". I don't know about others but I infer something different from small letters. You will figure that out when you read my songs.

I like how you have added a few of your job lingo to this piece: "net outcome".

Good job!!! But, you can make this better!!!

sudharm baxi said...

@Brosreview,

Great that you reviewed the piece..
REally no one has done that before ever..Loved your suggestion and gonna implement them right away.

Can't actually change the 'i' though because - this exudes the fact that i have shed my ego entirely, that i don't even use a capital 'I',

But one thing i would certainly keep in mind that if i write on someone else's behalf or perspective i should use an 'I' instead..

Thanks a lot..

gautami tripathy said...

The experience that is life comes through..

mainline to the heart