Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Ubiquitous Burden of being unnatural

This poem is in response to a fantastic site Three word wednesday, the 3 words to be used were - Burden, Natural, Ubiquitous.

Burden in the mind
burden on the back ..

Burden in the street
burden on the rack ..

Kill the burden
be merry ..
Don't fake around
be a sweet cherry ..

Artificial intelligence
synthetic clothes ..
Manufactured features
plastic growths ..
Hypocrite behaviour
creating moths ..

Shamming is taught
forgery practiced ..
Nothing is real
everything transfixed ..

Be natural is all
i suggest ..
in order to put
your brain at rest ..

Sooner or later
you will find The treasure ..
that was always
ubiquitous in nature
..

--sudharm baxi

25 comments:

susan said...

My first time here. How do you respond to these so quickly? :-) Thanks for the read.

No entry yet but I am running a Contest

Jacqueline said...

Enjoyed this, Be Natural is definitely my motto. And I'm counting on that ubiquitous treasure.

ThomG said...

This post really rang true. Nicely done.

sudharm baxi said...

@susan,
Got to be fast in this world which beats even the fastest, haha philosophies all around..
thanks dropping by..

@Jacqueline, ThomG,

Felt good that this piece touched a chord with you guys..

anthonynorth said...

Great insight and advice there. And thanks for the kind words on my blog. Much appreciated.

niket said...

u rock bro!!!

This is a plastic world full of plastic people..... dont know when these people will become natural... i guess never.....

Tumblewords: said...

Ah, fine work. What is it that makes natural so hard to 'be'?

Just someone said...

Of course, natural is the way to be...

Just someone said...

hit submit too soon, without adding what I meant to

Nice work!!!

Jeeves said...

Nice one here

Jeeves said...

Nice one here

sudharm baxi said...

@anthony
Great having you here..

@niket
u 2 rock buddy and make me rock 2..

@Tumblewords
yes indeed, it is so very tough to be just natural..

@Just someone,
@Jeeves

Thanks a lot for dropping by..

Witchmojo said...

Cool use of the words and I'll be keeping my eye out for that ubiquitous treasure!

sudharm baxi said...

@Witchmojo,

You better keep it!!
Loved your short story.. ;)

Angel said...

Nice work!

Sepiru Chris said...

Fun visual and auditory aesthetics.

Good effort.

sudharm baxi said...

@Angel, Sepiru

Thanks!!

lissa said...

it's easier said then done, as the saying goes, not everyone can be so natural, I do like the title of the poem

sudharm baxi said...

@Lissa,

Certainly, this world hates natural beings and processes..

And thanks for the title, they certainly are the passage to one's passage!!

niket said...

woooaaa!!!

someone's getting followers....
boss this is jus start....u jus keep going..... u will surely get ur treasure..

hum to akele nikle the.....
log aate gaye....
aur carvan banta gaya....

one more believer said...

loved the message.. great use of the prompt words!

Pretty Me!! said...

awesomw thoughts !! well written :)

sudharm baxi said...

@niket,

Carvan ka mukaam tay na tha
lekin dosto ke saath mukaam
ki parvaah bhi kisi thi

@one more...
@Pretty Me,

Thanks!!

Brosreview said...

Hmm, mind-blowing this piece!!! You know what, I am instantly having a melody buzzing in me head now. And, honestly, that makes this read awesome!!!

This section, my friend -

"Artificial intelligence
synthetic clothes ..
Manufactured features
plastic growths ..
Hypocrite behaviour
creating moths ..

Shamming is taught
forgery practiced ..
Nothing is real
everything transfixed .."

Brilliant!!! Now, I know for sure that the experts in the poetry section shall object my comment. But, let me write here that those lines are unconventional and very very good.

Precise and super-effective!!! Well, at least to me they are. So, keep writing!!!

sudharm baxi said...

Ajey,

You know what you have made my day..

thanks a lot and i would try my level best not to be complacent on that sweet appreciation of being UNCONVENTIONAL..

You are too good and i admire your works immensely..